Patti,
For your three year old there are so many great shows. your 14 month old may not "get it" but should enjoy them all the same!
I think that the Halloween Party might not be a great use of your money, as you probably won't get to enjoy many of the hours it offers, because of a presumed earlier bedtime for your younger children. As for meals, I love Tusker House for any meal, but especially breakfast for the characters. 'Ohana, Crystal Palace, Chef Mickey's and Garden Grill are all great.
On top of those here are a few to consider;
And I know it will sound funny, but they may also like the
Biergarten in the Germany Pavilion for dinner. The G-rated Oktoberfest-styled entertainment is very energetic and entertaining, and the buffet has plenty of kid-friendly choices. And while I am not an overall fan of the
Sci-Fi Dine-In Theater, it is a great venue with decent kid-friendly food that always is a popular kid destination!
Have a magical (and delicious) vacation!