Hi Jackie,
I just read your "savvy with the discounts" line to my husband and he cackled like a hyena. It's good to know that someone out there thinks I'm thrifty :-)
Without knowing a particular person's dining habits, I hesitate to make particular meal package recommendations. Light eaters or folks very much on the go, might be fine with the basic meal plan or paying a la carte. Big eaters, foodies, or those who like lots of table service dining, might be best served by the deluxe dining plan. To decide what makes sense for your particular needs, I suggest you go to the website allearsnet.com and search for an article called Menus From Around the World. Here you will find links to the menus of most of the WDW restaurants, with pricing information given. I would make out a sample day or two of your dining, see how much that will cost, and then compare it the price of the Dining Plan.
I personally have been very happy with the decision to purchase the
Disney Dining Experience (DDE)card. One thing to consider when traveling with a group of adults is that when using the DDE card, you receive a 20% discount on alcohol as well as on food. The Dining Plan does not include alcohol, so you must add this cost onto your bill. If you'll be having some cocktails in the evening, this alone could reap you quite a bit of savings. An additional thing to think about is that your DDE card is good for an entire year. So, if you're planning on taking several trips to WDW in any 365 day period (as I often do), then you can continue to save with the DDE card.