Hi Tracie --
Thanks for visiting the Mom's Panel, and Happy Birthday to your little princess! She is going to have one magical birthday.
Because you said you want your daughter to be a part of the parade, I'm assuming you're referring to
Move It! Shake It! Celebrate It! Street Party. This is an interactive show filled with music and dancing as giant gift-wrapped packages make their way up Main Street towards Cinderella Castle. The parade runs several times throughout the day and is short enough that even if it were to run at 3:00, you would still be able to make it to your reservation. Check the park guide when you arrive for exact times.
If you're referring to the Celebrate! A Dream Come True Parade, I don't see it listed on the calendar for May 9. This doesn't mean it's not running; it simply may not have been included in the schedule yet. This is more of the traditional Disney Parade. If you are trying to view this, I recommend watching it near Frontier Land where it begins. That way, you should be able to catch most of the parade before heading off to the Castle for your meal.
Hope this helps. Have a magical vacation!