Hi Rochelle,
Planning a trip to Disney can be very overwhelming for anyone. There is a lot to see and do. Being the mom of a special needs son, I like to plan around his "abilities" and get excited about the things we can do as a family and not focus on the things he can't. I think I've looked at traveling to WDW in a whole new way since we've had our son. I've seen another side of Disney that I would have never paid attention to otherwise. I see people there all the time with different degrees of disabilities and they all seem to be having a great time. We've never left disappointment - we always come away with some amazing memories.
Disney has a whole section on their website devoted to planning and information regarding traveling with disailities. For more information on that, click
here. WDW tries to be as accommodating as possible to those guests with disabilities. Keep in mind that there may be some attractions that you can't do as safety is Disney's # 1 priority. Make the most out of the things that you can do.
I am not sure what you mean about falling through the cracks in special offers due to disability. If you can resubmit some specific questions, the moms panel is happy to try to help you plan to get the most out of your trip.
I would encourage you to never stop planning and never give up on your trip. Disney can be a place that you come and leave your struggles behind if only for a little while.