Hi Dana! I know exactly how you feel. Each time I start planning a trip, it's a struggle to make these choices - but it's also a lot of fun!
The first thing I would suggest is for you to consider how much time you would be spending at your resort. If you think you may spend a good amount of time resting in your room or lounging by the pool, it may be worth it for you to spend the extra money for a deluxe resort. If you think you'll be spending the majority of your time in the parks and places other than your resort, I wouldn't pay the extra for amenities that you won't really be taking advantage of.
Out of the moderate resorts, I think that
Coronado Springs is a good choice. Because there is a convention center at the resort, there are amenities here that you won't find at the other moderates - such as a fitness center and spa. Some of the rooms here have been newly renovated and they are very chic.
As far as the dining plan goes, I would recommend making a quick list of the restaurants you would like to dine at while on vacation. The deluxe dining plan is a good choice if you would like to eat at some of the signature restaurants or dinner shows that require two credits, or if you like to eat at least two sit-down meals per day. I would also suggest looking over the menus at
www.allears.net to get an approximate idea of what your meals may cost. When you get to the main page of the website, click "Dining" at the top of the page, and on the dining page click on "The Menus". The menus here are frequently updated and will help you determine how much you would be spending on food. Then you can see which plan would be most economical for you.
I hope this helps! Once you get an idea of what you would like to get out of your vacation, the choices should be a little easier. Have fun planning!!